There has never been a press conference in American sports quite like the one we all got to witness Thursday morning.

Jimbo Fisher, one day after Nick Saban said Fisher paid for his entire 2022 recruiting class with NIL money, called a press conference in College Station to essentially tell the world that his former boss is a horrible human being with a bunch of skeletons in his closet.

And he must've used the word "despicable" a dozen times. He called him a "narcissist." Questioned how good a coach he really is. Then said Saban probably should have been slapped as a kid.

I mean, it was an all-timer folks!

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We thought the age of NIL was going to distort reality for the teenagers? Instead, it's turned the millionaire head coaches into the Real Housewives of the SEC.

I literally can't believe what I watched in that 10-minute press conference. Because, for the life of me, I can't remember a coach personally attacking another one to that degree. I can't even recall anything close, and I remember when John Chaney tried to fight John Calipari after a game. That wasn't this, though.

This was scorched earth. With napalm.

We'll get into the details in just a moment, but what amuses me so much is just how nonsensical and hypocritical the whole thing was.

Jimbo once again claimed Texas A&M didn't buy any players. Not a single one.

Remember, the Aggies just had one of the best single recruiting classes in college football history. After yet another middling season.

And it just so happened to be the first year NIL was truly in play for recruits. And Texas A&M just happens to have more money than Oprah. And then they just so happened to land a gazillion five-star recruits.

Pure coincidence.

And ... another thing to consider: Everyone is giving NIL deals to recruits. Every single school that matters. But we're to believe A&M just builds better relationships?

It's insanity. And nobody is buying it, Jimbo.

Except A&M fans. (Who are clearly willing to buy anything and everything.)

Either way, Thursday was incredible to watch. Because Jimbo is absolutely tired of not winning big in the SEC. And even though he beat Saban this past season for the first time, and then crushed it on the recruiting/NIL trail, he knows his program is nowhere close to Saban's. Whose is?

So, when Saban starts "throwing darts" at his program for trying to level the playing field, that was enough for Jimbo. He called a press conference to just eviscerate the person who helped give him a career. It was incredible theater.

Here are a few of my favorite quotes:

"Some people think they're God. Go dig into how God did his deal. You may find out about a lot of things you don't want to know. We build him up to be the czar of football. Go dig into his past, or anybody's ever coached with him."

Meanwhile, of course, anybody who has ever coached or worked with Jimbo has nothing but GREAT things to say about him as a boss! Hoooo Boy! That's some quality irony, but keep shooting your shots, Jimbo! I love the implication that Saban has some skeletons buried somewhere. Give us the details, Jimbo! There is clearly no honor among thieves anymore ... tell us about that deal!

""It's despicable that a reputable head coach can come out and say this, when he doesn’t get his way or things don’t go his way. The narcissist in him doesn’t allow those things to happen. It’s ridiculous when he's not on top."

Again. Remember, what Saban said -- that A&M bought its recruiting class -- is almost certainly true. To an extent anyway. Who knows the amount of money? And who knows if every single player got the same deal? But we're not naive enough to think they're in College Station purely for room and board, while turning down actual cash offers from other schools.

Jimbo might be playing the semantics game and thinking, "Well, WE didn't pay these players as a football program. Our collectives paid them. Not us." But come on, man. They were paid. To play football at Texas A&M. Just like recruits all over the country were paid. And that's what Saban meant. Either way, Jimbo's right. Saban IS a narcissist. And he might think twice next time about keeping A&M out of his mouth.

"I don’t cheat, and I don’t lie. I learned that when I was a kid. If you did, the old man slapped me upside the head. Maybe somebody should have slapped him.”

I have to admit: I almost choked when Jimbo said this. First off: It's a great line. And it's truly unbelievable he's saying this about the best coach who ever lived. More on that in a second!

But I know for a fact the second part of that first sentence isn't true. I've witnessed it. I've been there in the room. You watched his press conferences here, so you know too. It's all good. I mean, we all lie at certain points in our lives. Some more than others, but we all have said half-truths or non-truths. It's part of the human condition. But I can't imagine the faces of people in FSU's Moore Athletics Center hearing that quote. Their eyes might have rolled completely out of their heads. Good times!

"He's the greatest ever, huh? When you've got all the advantages, it's easy."

This one was another doozy. He's now saying that what Saban has done at Alabama isn't very hard. Or impressive. He's not just saying he should have been slapped as a kid. He's saying he's not really THAT good a coach. Which is blasphemy in college football circles. Especially in the SEC. And especially when the dude you're diminishing helped give you your start in Power 5 football. This one just speaks to how emotional this all is, because if anyone knows how hard it is to get on top and stay on top -- no matter the advantages you might have -- it's Jimbo Fisher. And yet he seemingly dismissed everything the man has accomplished in the last 15 years. Amazing.

"You can work for people like Bobby Bowden and learn how to do things. You work with other people and see how not to do things. There's a reason why I didn't go back to work for him."

This was the cherry on top to the beautiful, multi-layered, 10-minute sundae.

I love the sentiment here. Truly. But it would resonate so much more if Jimbo hadn't taken over directly from Bowden and immediately gone to the Saban Model of Running a Program. Fire most of the former Bowden coaches and staffers. Ban freshmen from talking to the media. Assistant coaches can't talk, either. Demand that fans pack the stadium for the spring game. Ask for more and more resources from the administration. All the time. Never relent. And when you lose, admonish everyone to, "Trust the process."

I always thought Jimbo was a pretty healthy combination of Bowden and Saban, honestly. He was modern in the way he ran a program, but just folksy enough with the media and the fans to not be completely unlikable like Saban. He wasn't standoffish. Or aloof.

But let's be honest. He's probably a little closer to Saban, right? Whether he wants to admit that or not.

Which is fine. It's won him plenty of games and made him more money than he'll ever be able to spend. But the hypocrisy of that press conference was almost too much to bear.

The truth is that almost all coaches at this level have giant egos. They're almost all narcissists. They're all looking for advantages. And they bemoan each of the ones they don't get.

Jimbo and Saban are a whole lot alike in that regard. And nobody is feeling sorry for either one of them. Certainly not at Florida State!

But I just thank the heavens we live in a world where a head coach can call a press conference to specifically attack another head coach -- who just happens to be one of the greatest in the history of the sport -- and insinuate he's a cheater and a liar and not even that good a coach.

What an amazing moment. Thank you, football gods!

Contact senior writer Corey Clark at corey@warchant.com and follow @Corey_Clark on Twitter.

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Talk about this story with other Florida State football fans in the Tribal Council